It was clucking and pecking, flapping and squacking.  Feathers were everywhere. 

And there I sat in the second row of the Kombie (public transport vehicle) thinking about how quickly this woman would be escorted out if she had carried a live chicken onto a public bus in the United States.  But, alas, I'm not in the U.S. anymore.  Here in Swaziland, it is just as common to carry an unhappy chicken with its feet tethered together down the street and onto a public vehicle as it is to pick up a bag of frozen vegetables from the grocery store on your way home from work in the States.  So, I concentrated on holding my breath to avoid inhaling feathers, while no one else paid much attention.

The next series of events were priceless.

The sweet Swazi woman, as a sincere gesture of desired friendship grabbed the angry chicken and thrust it toward me, proclaiming, "GIFT!"  Mind you, of all the unwanted gifts I've ever received, this one was by far the absolute worst.  Most of its feathers were now missing, and its less-than-desirable wings were still flapping at a constant rate.  I would much rather keep my distance from this flightless bird.  But of course, "no thank you" is not in the Swazi vocabulary.  Turning down a gift in Swaziland is as offensive as cussing in front of your grandma in the U.S., and I was not about to make this cultural faux-pas. 

So I reluctantly received the furious fowl.

. . . And now I was holding the clucking disaster as we rumbled down the dirt road. 

The kind woman then asked, "You like?!"  (Being from the rural area, she spoke and understood very little English.

In an attempt to avoid my fate of holding my new feathered friend any longer (or heaven forbid, taking it home with me), I responded kindly, "Ngi cha tsandza chicken.  Ngi cha funa gudla chicken lamhla."

(translated:  "I no love chicken.  I no want to eat chicken today.")

(Give me a break, it's the best I could come up with, given the little SiSwati I know!)

With this, I had managed to gain the attention of most of the Kombie riders because I had become the hilarious white girl holding (and quite evidently hating) the annoying chicken while using SiSwati verbs like love and eat.  Swazis love to laugh.  Especially at me.  J

Luckily, the story finishes well as another kind woman took note of my plight and helped me to communicate my inability to receive the chicken.    I was able to hand off the bird, thanking the woman profusely for her enormous generosity before exiting the vehicle and rummaging through my bag for hand sanitizer. 

Just another day in Swaziland. . .

In other news, for those of you who know Dennis Brock, I had the honor of attending his wedding this past weekend.  He and Zwakele had a lovely and exciting ceremony, complete with dancing, singing, kissing, and fruit cake!  . . .I will let him share all of the details with you, but will simply say that we Americans are pretty lame in our wedding celebrations compared to Swazis!  It was a great wedding and is sure to be a great marriage!  (Be sure to browse my photos)!

And think of me next time you are enjoying chicken wings…  hopefully the wings you enjoy will not be flapping or losing feathers!  ;)

Until next time,

Katie Movic